Tuesday, September 14, 2010

What do you do when your tupperware is missing!?!? (not a laughing matter)

not totally related... but hilarious!

Okay, so... I got rid of the Worst Roommate of All Time (if she ever stumbles upon my occasional mentioning of her then I hope she will take what I say into consideration, for her own future well being.)  She has now been replaced by a shiny new roommate, who has a very positive reputation among my friends so I felt confident that she was a good choice. Even if not, I assume I could only go up from where I had been.  So far, she has proven to be all that I hoped, which is low maintenance, friendly, tidy. Yippee!!!!!  The relief is wonderful!!!
{Note to my Roomies - if you are reading this (doubtful) you may want to stop here if you tend to be sensitive. Honesty is a thing to be valued, my friends}
Somehow, within a week and a half of my new roomie moving in, three of my newly purchased and adored Pyrex tupperware dishes, as well as a newly purchased IKEA cutting board, VANISHED.  At least that is what they want me to believe, they being the person that took them!!! (I just envisioned myself snarling, screaming and pulling my hair while saying that, maybe tearing my clothes, like Biblical times.)
I have scoured the kitchen and repeatedly asked both my roommates if they have any clue as to the items whereabouts, to the point of nearly cornering and interrogating them.  Both have claimed ignorance, to which I have responded something like, “I’m just baffled! I mean, I’ve looked everywhere! I haven’t even used them lately - and I mean where - where on earth could a cutting board go!?!?” (lots of broad hand motions.) To which they quickly agree, “that’s so weird...” while slowly backing their way out of the kitchen leaving me silently pleading: wtf!?

Now, I do not believe that either of these gals are prone to lie.  I know that one of them (Roomie 1) might forget that she had, perhaps, transported them to her boyfriends house to make him dinner or something, but not lie. The other gal (Roomie 2) I haven’t known long enough to say for sure, but as I said, she has great references.
So where does that leave me???
situation a) Roomie 1 completely forgot that she left the items elsewhere
situation b) Roomie 2 is actually a liar yet to be exposed
situation c) Roomie 2 broke them, lost them or did something with them she feels she can’t admit to
situation d) I misplaced them, even though I feel I can say without a shadow of a doubt that I was not using those items near the time of their disappearance
situation e) The Worst Roommate of All Time came back into the house and took them, thus further confirming her status as The Worst Roommate of All Time.
I’m thinking E.  I know you’re thinking I’m crazy, but Worst Roommate of All Time claimed that she “lost” her key - curiously, right after she had come back to the house to pick up her last load of items.  I was skeptical from the moment I heard it. Well, crazy or not, for the sake of my sanity I had the locks changed within 24 hours of the thought entering my mind. 
Now that I can check that off my list I am still short 3 Pyrex dishes and 1, hardly used, cutting board.  The reason I’m still flaring my nostrils about it is because I know that it is actually very unlikely that Worst Roommate of All Time would actually come here to take those random items (too lazy.) So the question still remains: Who Dunnit!!!!!   Aaaaggghhhh!!! Will I ever sleep again??? 
But seriously - I really just hope it was me, and I really hope I find out - soon!!! 
Advice is welcome - to all of you virtual air molecules out there, buffering and releasing  my rants. (It's been pointed out to me that the previous sentence doesn't make sense. I'm okay with it.)