My hands are sticky and citrus smelling from eating an orange. I bought a pomegranate for the first time yesterday but I'm afraid to open it. I'm not sure how to tell if it's ripe. It looks so strange and foreign on my kitchen counter next to the oranges and peaches, like an alien pod. The temperature outside is creeping towards about a gazillion degrees Fahrenheit and the difference in temperature inside my house is negligible. I am sitting underneath the fan, moving as little as possible, trying to stay cool. I have struggled with feeling as though my life is not moving lately. A couple factors have attributed to this: I still live with my mother and I don't really know what to do with my career. These have been my boulders to jump for the past five years or so. I have gone back and forth, sideways and straight about initiating change and have yet to follow through. Of course, there are ways I justify my life choices, or maybe lack there of. It is definitely cheaper living with my mom, although at times emotionally draining. We've gotten a roommate recently who is balancing out our mother/daughter madhouse. And, who really knows what they're doing at 24... and 8 months??? But I feel I am drastically behind and picture myself a crumpled old woman sharing a bed with my slightly more crumpled mother. My foresight is telling. It's time to try something more than... this.
Since I am notoriously indecisive, especially in regards to bigger things like moving out or a career change I am starting with baby steps. I have compiled a list of goals that are accomplishable at this time in my life to enrich my experiences and open new doors. I tried to come up with 25 goals but I am a bit short so 20 will do. I will add to it as I come up with more.
1. Sew - eventually a wearable article of clothing
2. Learn to play Tennis
3. Take a Salsa/Ballroom dance class
4. Run a marathon or 1/2 marathon
5. Cook at least one meal a month
6. Read all the books I own
7. Join/start a book club
8. Start a blog - yeayah! Check!
9. Start a happy hour club
10. Pick up guitar again
11. Take an acting class
12. Teach myself the piano
13. Make music mixes for friends
14. Paint something I like enough to hang in my room
15. Enter an essay contest
16. Become better at small talk
17. Finish my photo albums
18. Take a self defense class
19. Edit some of my home movies
20. Take a writing class
I am going to ask that you please refrain from mocking my list. I know many of you may have lists that include items such as living with a bush tribe for three years or going sky diving. This is not that type of list. This is my attempt to better myself at things I enjoy, things I want to try and things I know I will actually do. I don't want to feel burdened by a list of extremes. The purpose of my list is to encourage every day inspiration. I have already started on several items on the list and will update my progress regularly. I feel good about it. I feel inspired already. I realize this may not get me out of my moms house, but at least it could distract me.
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